Skip to main content

"Last April"

April it is...
Oh April, here you come again!
Last April, she was here, sitting in front of me, smiling. 
Cheering us up with the delightful presence of hers. 
Today, April it is. 
That sofa is vacant, that room longs for her presence. 
Today no one's smiling here. 
There's an incessant silence, a void. 
Today it smelled like misery. 
This April is horrific. That April was just another April, a normal April. 
Nothing will ever be the same again. 
Every April will be a wistful melancholic April.
Last April, she was planning for Ramadan. 
Oh how excited she was! 
That joy, that kind grin...
From grocery shopping, to menu planning. 
It was all sorted out because of her existence. 
April it was...
April it is...
Last April, I wasn't terrified by the month. 
Today, I am...
Today, heaven must be having a beautiful April. 
A divine April...

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"The woman I am"

I am a woman! A powerful, resilient woman  A voice of revolution  A miracle A universe within myself  I do not seek validation  I am a magic maker  I am compassionate, kind and forgiving  I love unconditionally  My empathy is my strength  I am the creator of my story  A writer of my destiny  I am a woman! With dreams, hopes and beliefs  My tenderness is my fearlessness  I am more than you can see I am a warrior  A fighter  I will rise, every time, I fall  I will rise and shine  I am a woman! 
1 comment
Read more

"One month without my Mama Jan"

It's been a month since I lost mama. Which makes it 30 days, 720 hours, 43,800 minutes and 2,592,000 seconds without her beautiful presence. They say time flies, it really does but there's an incessant sadness. I have no idea how did I get the patience to live a life that doesn't include her. There's pain, there's constant fear and misery. However there's a sense of contentment, a satisfaction that she's in a good place. A feeling that she's finally gonna get what she deserves - happiness and joy. She never had a great life, she struggled through it all. Yet she never gave up, not even when she was on bipap and doctors were not very hopeful. She fought her battle against this lethal disease. She kept on fighting until April 21, 10:30 am. She tried her best. She gave it all. My Mama jan was a warrior. She used to send us selfies from her isolation room with a victory sign. She used to send me voice notes saying, "I'm fine my love, don...
7 comments
Read more