Life as I know it.

The year that started with hopes, dreams, aspirations. The year that was just another year to embark on new adventures. To start it all over again. To work on resolutions. To break those resolutions. It was the year to begin a journey towards life. A journey with new paths and better destinations.  However, as the year approaches, the world came across an obstacle. Some called it 'just a flu' others referred to it as another epidemic. The year was shaken by the horrific reality of the world where thousands of people were dying on daily basis. People lost their loved ones. The year that started with embracing each other ended up practicing social distance. People were terrified. Hospitals were occupied. Graveyards were overwhelmed. The year turned out to be gruesome. Everybody was locked up inside their homes. Streets were deserted. Shops were closed. Businesses were affected. People lost their jobs The year was all about uncertainty,  Unpredictability and  Unr...

Have you ever thought of giving up on life? A life which is unpredictable. A life which has boundless uncertainties. A life surrounded by burdens. Of regrets, Remorse and Despair Have you ever thought of giving up on life? A life that feels like a demon which suffocates you to the core. A demon so strong, so terrific that you lose control. Life is not a bed of roses, they say. Indeed, it is a mighty throne of bloody thorns that none can conquer. Have you ever thought of giving up on life? A life which is a mysterious puzzle. An undiscovered treasure. The truth is; You do not really want to give up on life, even if you wish so. You crawl, You struggle, You wander, In search of meaning, To find out the ways to overcome the obstacles,  To win the battle, The battle we call life. Keep fighting, Keep losing, In pursuit of a remarkable victory. Never give up! 

Pandemic hit the world, People got scared, People were anxious, Everybody was concerned, Economy was ruined, Jobs were lost, There was crisis, agony and despair, They say wear mask  People wore masks,  People had been wearing the masks,  Since the very beginning The mask,  That wasn't visible  The mask,  That can only be observed through deceit, treachery and hypocrisy.  It's the mask that everybody carries like a sword,  The mask which conceals the reality,  Reality of relationships,  Truthfulness of emotions,  Reality of the world.  A world which is surrounded by the masks.  The mask which is lethal,  The mask which will leave no stone unturned to harm you,  The mask is worn by people around you.  It can strangle you with the duality of truth and lie.  The mask is a serpent  A slow poison which will suffocate you,  The mask is worn by people around you, those who claim to love yo...

It's a man's world, they say...  I've grown up hearing this cliché statement that, "the world belongs to men"  I've always been a rebel, a girl who'd try and bring a change, a positive empowered change. I've raised my voice against injustice and cruelty that is inflicted upon women by her very own protectors, her saviors, men... But, today, I feel like a failure, a loser who is denying the reality of the world.  There's no point of fighting for equality or justice. It's a man's world after all. A man can do anything, they can exploit you, abuse you, blame you and seek refuge in the world which absolutely belongs to him. No place is your place, woman.  This place belongs to vultures, for whom you are nothing but a piece of meat.  Nobody would hear your cry. It is useless to seek justice in a wolves den.  No place for a woman in a man's world.  It's a man's world...

People fight, A woman's fault Society is flawed, A woman's fault Catastrophic disasters, A woman's fault My son is innocent it's her wife who is uncivilized My brother is a wonderful man it's her woman who is dreadful Domestic violence, A woman's fault Sexual assault, A woman's fault Acid attack, A woman's fault Men will be men let them have fun It's the woman Shackle her Keep an eye  Do not let her breathe  It's always the woman's fault

We are the shadows of the dark Demons of the darkest hour Surrounded by an eternal agony There's no place to reside  But a wretched gloomy street which goes nowhere, guarded by the hounds  A deprived shadow of the secret valley of grief  There's no way to go  The shadows feel frightened  The night is long followed by the forever eclipse  They mourn  They cry  They pray  Shadows are diminishing because of vulnerability  Dreams of light and day are dying  A light that never comes  We are the displaced shadows of the darkest night  We cry, we mourn, we pray 

It was a dull afternoon... I was standing right there, while you were laying on the hospital bed. I was numb...staring at your feet. They were swollen. I touched your feet with this desire that they'd show some movement, some signal...that you're here...with me. I couldn't believe the touch of my hands. My sensory organs were failed to process the information. I did not give up, i wanted to be sure. I wanted to feel your presence, your warmth. I leaned forward and kissed your feet...they were cold. You were never cold, Nani Jan.  I couldn't believe that kiss... I couldn't believe that touch. So i remained there, for moments... It was my moment...it was our moment. There was undesirable noise, of ventilator and respiratory equipment...i wanted to hear your voice. In that very moment, i wanted you to call my name. I wanted you to scold me...i wanted you to open your eyes and see...see my face and say, "you're not eating healthy, look at your face ...